I read this post by One Dude where he asks the question, "Would you rathar be dumb and happy or smart and bitter?" What a synchronicity, on the bus home from the swim meet tonight we all discussed the question: "Would you rather be hated or ignored?" Most all of the high-schoolers said they would rather be hated because it would at least give them some kind of attention. Interesting. Do you think people's answers to this question might vary as a function of age? Me, I would rather be ignored. But that's just little old(er) me...
Booknotes 3.23
18 hours ago
3 comments:
I suppose it depends on the way being hated or ignored manifested itself. I experienced both at the hands of my step-mother, abuse and complete silent treatment. The former was horrible, the latter was even more intolerable. For about two months she didn't even acknowledge that I existed living in the same house, and my 11 year-old self craved any sort of recognition from her. Still do, sometimes, in a sad way.
If being ignored meant a live and let live with minimal civil interaction, I'd definitely vote for that at any age. But if it meant someone denying that I exist in my presence, I can't say I'd feel any differently than those teens on the bus.
Téa, I'm so sorry you had to experience that. I've always thought of ignoring as basically benign. But in this case it was used as active abuse. How sad.
I'm not sure if I'd rather be hated or ignored. I think it entirely depends on who's doing the hating or ignoring. If a stranger does it, who cares? But a loved one.....hmmm. I'd rather be hated. Hatred is very close to love. It implies passionate feelings. Ignoring you, though, that implies apathy or lack of caring at all. That feels like crap.
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